Educatin' Slim

By Bronco T

Ya know ol’ Slim I’m getting’ old, a little long now in the tooth,
But I’m a larnin’ many things, I knew not in my youth.

Take fer instance I lately larned, about them cows we herd,
‘vironmental fellers claims they’s smart, which thought to me had not occurred.

They claims a great conspiracy, amongst that bovine race,
Has done polluted up the air, at a mighty rapid pace.

It seems them cows do gather, I reckon late at night,
To belch and fart together, with abandon and delight.

Now this foul and noxious cloud it seems, rises through the air,
And melts a big ol’ ozone hole, in air that once was fair.

An’ Slim that aint the worstest thing, that them cows has done,
It’s scary what them bovines do, I tell ya now ol’ son.

And what I’m ‘bout ta say, will shake ya to the core,
Bein’ ‘round them cows so long, aint fit ya fer the score.

They’ve found them cows is congregatin, round them streams and tanks,
A trompin water to a froth, an’ cavin’ in the banks.

An’ Slim ya know them little fish, the shiny ones ya see,
Them cows has stomped ‘em into mush, ‘midst choruses of mooin’ glee.

So ya see ol’ Slim it’s true, bout cows ya don’t know much,
They’s really quite a treacherous lot, prone ta sabotage and such.

Now Slim I see you’re doubtin’, ‘bout these thing I’ve larned,
But you can bet that I’ll be watchin, and my head aint turned.

For I intend ta catch ‘em, whilst they prey at night,
‘cause ya see them ‘vironmental fellers surely must be right.

The reason that I know they’s right, is really plain ya see,
I seen it all the other night, right there on T.V.

And Slim I do intend to, do my moral part,
An’ stop them wicked bovine, from when they stomp, ‘n belch, ‘n fart.


I wrote this poem after I heard some fool environmentalist make the statement that cow farts were causing holes in the ozone layer. After I about laughed till I passed out I wrote this poem as a spoof.